I’m feeling brave,
so I’ll put this out there
before my nerves get the best of me.
I have struggled with my weight and body image
for as long as I can remember.
Up and down
on the merry-go-round,
never good enough,
never thin enough.
I don’t know where it stems from,
but I’m pretty sure it’s not as much
about what I’m eating,
but about what’s eating me.
Even if another diet
gets me into a pair of old jeans,
the root of the problem
still lurks beneath the surface.
I believe we’re here
not just to live,
but to learn,
and that every challenge
is actually an opportunity for growth,
like a little test from above.
Until you know what you need to know,
the issue keeps coming back
in different forms and places.
I’m really ready to be free
from this challenge in my life,
ready to do the work it takes
to get to the bottom of it
and then rise above it.
Even if it hurts.
It feels like crossing a bridge,
which is exactly what I did
as I drove to my first meeting
with a small group
of women who are also ready
to take this leap of faith.
I took this picture on my way there,
just before crossing an actual bridge.
when I saw the radiant sunlight
that edged its way into the shot,
I knew it was a sign
to keep going,
to be open
and to live in the light.