We all have big shoes to fill. Sometimes it’s a conscious choice, as we try to follow in the footsteps of amazing people we have known or looked up to, or when we step into a new role that’s been vacated by someone else. Sometimes it’s subconscious, the way we carry on values and thought patterns and perceptions of the world fed to us by our parents, caregivers, mentors and teachers.
Whenever Tru pulls out his daddy’s dress shoes, he puts his tiny feet inside and then struggles to move forward. Each step is a major undertaking. The shoes are so heavy that he gets stuck in one place, sometimes toppling over because his little feet won’t stay planted.
It’s adorable to watch a preschooler do this; it’s kinda painful to see or be an adult in this predicament. We’ve all done it: tried to squeeze into someone else’s shoes and pretend they’re ours. On the surface, it seems like a brilliant idea: do what others do, say what others say, think what others think, look how others look as a shortcut to receiving love, experiencing success, feeling fulfilled. If it worked for them, why not us? Well, we eventually find that following someone else’s lead all the time is a path riddled with challenges. We get stuck, we get tired, we get bored, we get blisters, and then we get bitter. And, quite frankly, walking a mile {or more} in someone else’s shoes just keeps us off our own path. I think we can – and should – learn from others’ missteps and be inspired by their successes, let their outcomes influence our decisions but not dictate them. It’s like window shopping; you’ll want to look closer at the stuff that captures your attention, but not necessarily own it.
You get to choose your one-of-a-kind shoes in the perfect size, the perfect color, with the perfect traction and support to carry you on your individual path. You do not need to wear the same shoes your mom did, your best friend does, or your personal hero has. In fact, there’s not a pair of shoes in the world that you are expected or meant to fill. You deserve your own damn pair! Find the perfect ones and wear them to death. They’ll be the most comfortable shoes you’ll ever own.
