One year ago today, I got brave and told the truth – knees knocking, voice quivering, angels dancing.
And as soon as I let courage take charge, everything changed.
Though I’d been posting stories here about my personal journey – from magical moments to massive sinkholes – since 2006, I’d been holding back on one small (okay, major) thing. “What I haven’t shared publicly,” I wrote in a blog post called The Sixth Sense: There’s Something I Need To Tell You, “is the extent of my own life-long intuition.”
It had been a lifelong secret, shared only with close family and friends, and in circles I deemed super-safe. For so many years I was scared of being labeled as crazy, worried I wouldn’t be taken seriously in other aspects of my work, and unsure how to put those gifts to good use. So, I quietly worked to hone it, experiment with it, set boundaries around it, and share the gifts of it with folks I trusted. By the time 2013 rolled around, it felt like I was leading a double life; downplaying my intuitive connection with some folks while letting it flow with others. I could practically see the crossroads before me.
Ultimately, my decision to come clean with all of you was born out of faith, as I realized that hiding the truth – letting fear win – was no longer working. Why would the benevolent God I believe in give me this, I wondered, if I’m not meant to put it to good use? It was so much bigger than me. So I surrendered to it, devoted my work to it, and let the universe take the wheel.
And holy wow. The response was crazy-amazing. Not only from dear hearts like you who celebrated my announcement and intuitive connections (thank you so much!), but from the Great Beyond. From the get-go, opportunities arrived, ideas flowed, my calendar filled with readings and speeches and projects. And their impact on others over this past year has been awe-inspiring for me; it is an absolute honor to usher in meant-for-you messages and bear witness to the transformations, the aha moments, the soul-deep truths that result from these connections.
It almost seems silly now, looking back on how fear nearly kept me from this. It is so easy to get in our own way, to be the one thing that keeps us from experiencing the big things, the brave things, the meaningful things. Truth is, we can’t experience magic while hiding from it. That’s what this year has taught me and I’m eternally grateful.
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